"Well, my putting was atrocious Saturday morning and Wendy couldn't find a thing to spend her money on in Dorothy Perkins and you couldn't see your hand in front of your face when we set off for Sticker so the harbingers were definitely favouring the Doomists. Even the Wine gums only had three green ones!
At the field, a poor lady had to have numerous attempts to just get into the field with her back wheels slipping and everyone just watching her. From out of nowhere, sawdust appeared. Is the fifth dimension really in rural Cornwall? Goodness! A wheelbarow appeared. Its like Close Encounters. And that hill is just like Devils Mountain.

I think we managed to extricate the Parking Marshal from out of our wheel arch in time for him to watch the start and moved to registration. Hang on, thats Ceri and Richard. After 7 days of marriage and they can't find anything better to do on a Saturday Night! No PB's from those two then. Ceri remembered her new surname at the second attempt at registering and that took out total to 19 for the night.
Wendy, old sport, you realise you could be second or third scoring lady tonight. Ample chest pushed out and a sub 7 minute warm up and she was ready for the start. The now obligatory hurtle from the start to get across the main road before a TNT truck gets you and up the old hill we go. This is exactly the type of evening when our hi-viz vests really are the envy of every race commentator and I can see Carnies a good distance ahead.

Pete, Dave, Mike and myself are close enough to each other to each hold the corner of a flag to start with but old Pedro started to pull away and was never seen again until the finish line. Dave started to pull away as well. Oh no, Mike's going to come past me in a minute. Don't look back and he won't recognise me. Are they going quicker or am I going slower? I'm pulling people in so I must assume they are going quicker. Phew! thats a relief. In the mean time, Barry has swept past Chris and Wendy to leave them to fight their own battle.

Chris (above) realises a stiff arm may go over Wendy's head so resorts to old fashioned but effective running a bit faster. Wendy maintains she would have had him but ran an extra mile avoiding all the horse manure (it took me years to learn to use that word) on the road. The lights went out at four miles and there must be a few baby boomers in the Sticker/Hewaswater area as I couldn't even read my watch.

Battle on up the last hill and turn into the finish. Grab the goodies and walk towards the entrance to try and cheer Wendy in when Barry, Chris and then Wendy stroll in! Big improvements there then. Steve (above) is convinced he has had another cracker and results proved he was right!
Got back to the entrance and our friends Kathryn and Jackie from Hayle appeared with our Linda chasing them down. Who do we cheer for? Compromise, don't mention any names. Six C'mons and well done girls spares any blushes.If Linda was a prop forward she could play for St Helens. What determination and what a finish. Well done. And then, who comes round the corner with a big grin (see pic below) but Helen giving it some and finishing well.

Well done to Rory, Peter K, Steve H, Brenda (pic below - 3rd scoring Carn lady AND 3rd in her age group - well done!), Judy and Carol for completing the line up and sorry I didn't get to see you run so I could comment.
I have sent in some the the less well photographed members of the club who deserve at bit of PR.
Thanks to Sticker AFC and Snozzle and all their helpers and marshals for a good evening. Sorry I wasn't staying for the Karaoke but I doubt you had the music for On the Ball City anyway".

Steve Hole's first Sticker experience:

Muddy fields, horrible wet weather, long queues for the toilets and a Karaoke. Glastonbury festival? No, Sticker 5!

This was the first time I had raced Sticker and stepping into the unknown is always a daunting experience! The only knowledge about the race I had to go by was, ‘Carnie knowledge’ and all my fellow Carnies were saying the same thing “it’s a tough one” So I devised a cunning plan! I decided to read a book called “run fast” by this old fella called Hal Higdon. The plan was to read the book and use my new found knowledge during the race, as it unfolded before me! I must admit the book has given me a lot of tips and inspiration on “running fast” and isn’t just a fancy title!

So it was off to Sticker.

It was not long before the race was about to start:

 Firstly I spent 10 minutes in a cue for the toilet, listening to everyone bang on about how quick they expected to finish the race. This did nothing to boost my confidence! I drank my home-made energy drink, 1 part value orange juice 1 part water and added salt, I’d read it in a magazine! I spent a good twenty minutes warming up – jogging, stretching and most of all pretending! Pretending I knew what I was doing! I was all set!

Like a tin of Tesco Value Sardines, we were all crammed into the starting line. I tried to position myself towards the front with the familiar faces. I say familiar because I remember them shaking their heads as they passed me in the first mile from other events!

The race started and as per usual I started too quick, or as Chris Hodge once said “shot off like a scorched cat!” But I soon stalled at the first steep hill; I tried to think back to what the book had said about hill running, but the only thing that came to mind was a quote that said “Hill sprints are a very good cure for constipation!” Great. So we’ll scrap that idea! My cunning plan had failed, back to the drawing board!

I wish I had something really exciting to tell you about the race itself but I spent most of it in a daze. I can remember the weather though! It was a summers evening, turned Monsoon season!

The race itself wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be and although it had two steep hills at the start and the finish there were some really fast sections too!

A funny moment: Taking it easy down one hill, trying not to slip on the wet tarmac, I was over taken by a chap from Mounts Bay R.C. who shouted “COMING THROUGH!” as he shot down the hill, more like a “scorched bull” than cat. I thought to myself “I can’t remember that one in the book”  I guess you had to have been there!. 

I tried to stay focused in the middle of the race but couldn’t stop thinking about my foolish quick start. As the last mile approached my mind escaped from the bad thoughts of scorched cats and constipation cures, (not that I suffer from constipation! Or have a Cat even!) And the good thoughts started flooding in! The race was almost over! Up the last hill, round the corner, onto the final stretch and I could virtually taste the free Pasty! I even managed to muster enough energy for a heroic, scorched cat like sprint to the finish! The hard work was done. What was all the fuss about? Time to relax! I collected my complimentary goodie bag which  was………… a bag, ate my free pasty, had a quick gloat to Steve and Wendy, dodged the karaoke and headed back home.

Got home, gloated a bit more on Facebook, watched the Boxing and lived happily ever after! And as Gordon “effing” Ramsay would say “Sticker 5 2008, DONE!”

Well done to Rory, Steve & Wendy and all the other Carnies who raced, sorry I can’t remember everyone’s name! Thanks to Denise the massage lady for the lift and most of all thanks to the Sticker massive for a great event!"