Well, instead of things getting worse (let's face it McFly ain't a patch on Jayne County and the Electric Chairs!!), they've got a whole lot better.

The previous Queens courses were mountainous to say the least and you could also guarantee the weather was gonna make Basra seem like a polar expedition!

This year the new course was as flat as you'll get (i escaped with my life after my review so you all must have agreed) and clouds were everywhere as we started in a cool 17 degrees and light rain.

For the first time the race was a sell out but most managed to get a place as the places of the usual 'no show-ers' were scooped up.

At 10am we were off and plenty of Carn vests giving it a go.  Great to see Paul Sawford (above) back again and in great form.  He would be our first man home closely followed by Mark D (below).  Both of those boys are 'on fire' at the moment.

It was always gonna be a long run for me after a few months of not putting in the miles/injury etc.  That gave me the chance to check up on a few Carnies i never get to see and have a good social.  My old mate Knowlsey was also along for an easy ride.  We could get used to this!!

The crowd thinned out as we headed down to Gnomeworld.  Hardcore Carnies Mike Mack and Davy 'Boy' Mounter were soon disappearing into the distance as we headed onto the trails.

After encountering a few animals (cows, tigers and crocs - sadly no Steve Irwin) whilst on the trails, Steve Marks and Roy WS went all 'animal' and put the boot into me.  Unfortunately (for Steve) the short field section dealt up a muddy bit that was more slippery than a Carrow Road goalmouth and the lad was left wallowing in the mud (hippos as well??!!). There is a God!

Well, Pete Sargent i may be 8 foot tall but i managed where many truck drivers have failed in the past and managed to get under the old Iron Bridge without taking my head off!!

From there on it was straight back and flatpack all the way to the finish.  After we crossed the new A30 footbridge we came down the other side to spot more wildlife.  A Buzza-rd and it's family enjoying a bit of conservation by the roadside!!

Back at the finish there were some great personal performances by many Carnies.  Juliet managed a magnificent 1:28 despite having an off day!!  Karen Harrison (pic below) pulled off a PB of over 7 minutes with her time of 1:41:37.

Jo and Chris B had never broken the 2 hour barrier before.  Jo smashed a full 10 minutes off her PB and came home in 1:52.  Chris was cutting a bit fine (i'm sure if he listened to us all and binned those 'hotpant' shorts he'd see a massive difference!!).  He managed it - just.  His line to line time was under 2 hours.  All good if you had a chip on your shoe.  However, if you start in the masses of a race and also add on those extra 2 seconds everyone seems to get given in a GP race (you only just sussed it??) then it's gonna be a close run thing!

Congratulations to main man Kev Burnett for a fantastic race and giving us a half marathon in Cornwall that gives you half a chance at a PB.

Well, that's my report.  Stand by for Steve Marks' inevitable article in which i'm sure i'll be getting a verbal kicking after he beat me today.  Well, respect son!  A win's a win.  Enjoy it while you can Canary Boy!!! 

HOW CLOSE YOU LAZY SO AND SO!

How much can you do in three seconds? Usain Bolt about 30 metres. Not stopping at a drinks station. Most men could probably look away from the television for that long. Women could keep silent possibly. Come on Chris, I mean, its not very long is it and its all you needed to break two hours on Sunday! We were screaming at you near the finish but obviously not scary enough. Now what are you going to do? You can forget Truro so we are going to have to find a nice one for you before next year. Bristol or Cardiff would do you nicely.

Those nice people at NRR had provided what we all wanted. A nice flat half marathon course with
the capability of a distance PB. And they had got rid of that old Currant Bun that has marred the
Indian Queens half marathon for a while. Sorry CH, we owe you an apology. “He’s full of it” we said. Someone even said last week that Chris would think Everest was a bit of a pull for 29,029 feet. How wrong we were. I must admit all the Carnies looked so laid back and in party mood when we arrived at the WMC that I was going to order a round of drinks and the last time I did that was in a telephone kiosk. A couple of call offs meant Mickey was back in action again and some of our Ladies were looking for a good time (now, now lads, thats not why they came to Carn at all!). Dave Mounter had told us that aspiring Cornish Marathon entrants had to start their training with this race so take heed all of you looking for an extra couple of points in the GP.

The start line was opposite the garage and we watched the price of unleaded spinning round like a
fruit machine. A PB of around 10 minutes for Kev to give us race instructions gave us an indication
of how the race would go which is what he said and we were off. After two miles there wasn’t a runner after the first echelon who wasn’t a minute a mile quicker than they wanted to be. It was like charades where you were running someone elses race for them.
A thought went through my mind that we could do with a hill to slow everyone down. The flat route
continued and it felt like a big city pancake race. Then the Anchor cows appeared (glad you missed
that eh Carol?) but I swear one looked menacingly like Jock Semple and was going to throw me out
of the race. The mention of MacDonalds saw them all scatter.

Roy was keeping me company and believe it or not I was enjoying it. Then we came to the bog and
I thought, I’m a Hasher, I’ll breeze through this and leave them all in my wake. Flat on your face In
the mud with your bum up in the air like a cycle rack was the consequence of my arrogance.
Who are you going to be tonight asked Matthew? Well I thought about Mary Decker but settled for
Alan Pascoe. Have that part sealed for next year will you please.

Then we hit the old A30 and I swear that is the fastest I have ever gone under the Iron Bridge, with or without a car. What a great run in. The Owls were screeching away but us Canaries aren’t bothered by them and before you know it it was the old pull up to the finish and into the WMC where the novel idea of self service has hit road running and it was a bit like Crackerjack with your arms full. Back to the corner to cheer in the others and big congratulations to Jo for demolishing the 2 hour mark and Olivia (below) for getting through her first half. Thanks also to Sandy, Ali and Carol for taking the photos.

Even though they were only jogging round, I managed to take a couple of more scalps so
look out George, you’re next on my list so when can you have an injury that suit my timetable.
Juliet and Roy were trophy collectors again so once again we didn’t come home empty handed. A big thanks to NRR for providing a course that is probably the Best of Cornwall to paraphrase LRR and on a dry day could see a few personal records fall. Thanks to Roy for pushing me round but I’m sorry mate your lot are going to get stuffed on Saturday.

Now Chris, get rid of that Garmin which obviously works off the West Cornwall satellite, don’t have fish and chips the night before and don’t keep pinching all the black wine gums. And by the way, your missus says most things you do only take three seconds!

More photos in the gallery section.